Tinfoil Fashion and Water on Mars?

Chic Tinfoil Hat Design

First off, I post to show off the chic take on a tinfoil hat, made by one of my good surface-dwelling friends. A Robinhood-esque take on the traditional “wrap your head in foil” method, paired with a tinfoil feather that helps misdirect the mind-control waves that are spinning out of control in the air around us.

Water on Mars?

What has had us puzzled in the last week or so of “scientific discovery” was the water found on Mars, and just as importantly This farce set up to disgruntle mankind as Bill Nye tries to use his lizard mind-control to tear us apart. Of course a lot of us are excited about the discovery of water on our sister planet but truth be told, a lot more of us are worried about the inter-solar system implications this might have on our home planet of earth. There is a part of me that worries that a Martian aquatic race might be calling this water their home, and if they happened to discover our technology living on Mars; would they use it against us? Would they try to find us? Would they pair with moles, mammals, lizards, or the conniving dolphins!? Seems like this galaxy is getting smaller and smaller by the minute!

And another question; why would Bill Nye be featured with people who seemingly don’t care about the water on Mars on TV? This poses many questions because there guests weren’t some Jerry Springer mutants. These were people with money and TV personality. What did anyone here have to gain by acting in a way that would discredit such a discovery. I have a few theories.

1.  Bill Nye is reporting to lizard-superiors in space, using this video of our lack-of-higher-thinking as a way to keep himself out of the fire since Mammal resistance is at an all-time high.
2. He is looking to drive us against each other so that the lizard-minded humans will be frenzied into killing other humans who are not lizard-minded, or just killing in general. After all, a smaller herd makes it easier to weed out non-lizard supporters, thus brainwashing a future generation of humans to serve mankind much like how Cthulhu did the Sumerian’s ages ago before the disalignment of distant stars tossed him back into incorporeal ethereal chaos.
3. By maybe convincing the majority of humans that it isn’t something worth spending Government (lizard-fought-over) money on, so that lizards can lay claim to it and explore it first. Why else would The Curiosity Rover is forbidden to explore this source of water? It’s literal bullshit at it’s finest folks! Wouldn’t we want to introduce earth-based bacteria to Mars so that if all fails here, we have a safe-haven for the future of earth-produced creatures to thrive? I think this lizards may just want to pollute this water with their own Evil bacteria; especially the ones that Bill Nye is producing in the Lizard Genetic Modification Lair hidden in the woods of Maine.
4. There isn’t any water but reasons to have us fight against each other and/or appease lizard overlords is the main aim. After all, the research only shows evidence of water but no actual water has been observed due to the ludicrous lizard sanctions stated above in the 60’s after they crashed onto our planet after the sighting of the nuclear bombs.

I dunno folks, there are too many loose ends here. Too many ins and outs if you ask me.

The Tinfoil Podcast Episode 1: In Cod We Trust

billnyeisalizard.com welcomes you to the first episode of The Tinfoil Podcast! It’s been a loooooong time since I’ve made any direct contact with the outside world, but with things like TOR, FORTRAN simulated programming, and social media I’ve been able to find a balance between keeping a buffered connection to the rest of the world while enjoying endless solitude. This month, I delve into a range of topics that I feel are important to understand before I jump into the Bill Nye conspiracies in episode two.

First, I take a quick look at the political situation evolving between republicans, democrats, lizards, and molemen in an essay I wrote and hid into the code of the old website. I felt it was too good to just let vanish so I’m sharing it here, read from the horses mouth if you will. By the end, you will know who is working for who, and who is which species.

Next we have an interview with Marty Mouse*; a neo-nazi brother of Micky Mouse. I’ll be frank folks; I’m completely against the sort of thing he stands for. It doesn’t matter to me if you are Jewish, Buddhist, Dudiest, or most other faiths (other than those lizard-oriented ones). I’m tolerant of all who want to fight the good fight against our lizard oppressors. He did however have direct access to Walt Disney’s frozen head, so I figured despite our differences there were a few valuable truths that Todd (the guy I kidnapped to interview Marty because I don’t let anybody know what I look like) could squeeze out of him. I found out he sells weapons to the lizards, so I’m unsure of whether or not to let him live much longer.

From there I return to give a brief salute to the times where we had a much higher respect for the cod fishing industry, and to reveal the lizard people’s attempts to segregate us into a heartless mob by changing all our currency, pledges of allegiance, and faith in our founding ways from the cod fishermen who built our great nation, to their use of “God.” Thus bringing conflict into our systems of checks and balances.

As for the pie recipe at the end: just toss fried rice and beans into a pie crust and bake for a while; more details in the cast.

I hope you enjoy this episode! Next month I will delve further into topics concerning Bill Nye’s lizard-origins, water on Mars, and the computer glitch passed on as a “blood red super moon eclipse.” Seriously, what kind of bullshit is that? After all that and the moon-shenanigans happening every other day, I’m surprised most of you still believe in the moon.

*Marty Mouse is played by guest speaker Vincent C. The interview parts of the show are all improvised, unscripted, and unedited (except for sound quality). If you would like to be a guest speaker for the show, send me a message through the “contact” page on billnyeisalizard.com.